(Author’s Note: Substack revoked my ability to offer paid subscriptions. So, while I’ll continue to post content here if you’d like access to my intimate content, including the rest of this explicit video tutorial on Grinding, which includes a full demo with my girlfriend Sloane, you’ll have to go to my OnlyFans spicy site. You can find it here, and my handle is @talksexwithannette. Same subscription price. Zero censorship.)


Let’s talk about one of the sexiest ways to build arousal before you ever slip a finger inside: grinding.

No, not the kind you did in high school to bad club music—this is a slow, sensual, full-hand technique that makes a vulva melt. It's confident. It’s controlled. And it’s so good, she’ll start unconsciously rocking her hips into your palm, chasing the pressure, the rhythm, the yes of it.

Grinding with your hand is one of my favorite underrated fingering moves, and I don’t think enough people are doing it—or doing it right. That’s why I made a full how-to video for OnlyFans, breaking down everything from hand placement to rhythm to exactly how to apply pressure (and when).

But first, here’s your step-by-step guide so you can start playing with it tonight.


Technique #1: Grinding from Above (Palm Down)

Get in position: Sit beside her or kneel between her legs. Rest your hand palm-down so your whole palm cups her vulva.

Set your placement: Your palm should press directly over the clit, with your fingers resting along the outer lips and framing the vaginal opening.

Start slow: Gently grind your whole hand in small circles or rocking motions. This isn’t a fast rub—it’s more like pressing and shifting, like you're giving her vulva a slow dance with your hand.

Add pressure: Let your hand sink in with some steady, intentional pressure. Enough to be felt, not so much it overwhelms.

Tease the entrance: You can curl your fingers slightly to nudge the vaginal opening, but don’t go inside yet. That tease is half the magic.

This angle gives her that full-clit, full-vulva contact that feels grounding, steady, and ridiculously sexy. It’s the kind of move she might start rocking her hips into—and when that happens, keep going.


Technique #2: Grinding from Below (Palm Up)

Let’s flip things—literally.

Reposition: Now reach from underneath, sliding your hand palm-up with your fingers pointing toward her clit.

Placement is key: The heel of your palm should be pressing gently into the vaginal opening, while your fingers drape along the clit and upper vulva.

Grind, don’t rush: Keep that same circular or rocking motion, but now with the heel of your hand adding that deep, delicious pressure down low.

Add the pulse: Once she’s warmed up, try pulsing the heel of your palm into her vaginal opening while your fingers hold steady or add clitoral motion. Think: a subtle, rhythmic push that mimics the feeling of penetration without thrusting.

Layer it: You can keep grinding with your palm while adding in small clit strokes with your fingers—or even slip a finger inside while still maintaining that outside pressure.

This version is more internal-feeling, more filling, more oh my god don’t stop. Use it when she’s close, or if you want to drag her orgasm out into something slow and rolling.


Want to see exactly how it’s done—hand placement, pressure, motion, and all?

I filmed a full demo video that shows both of these moves in action. It’s up now on my OnlyFans (because Substack would blush and pass out).

This technique is a game-changer, and your fingers are about to become her new favorite sex toy.

Happy grinding,
Cheers!
💋 Annette


Don’t Miss Your Opportunity To Have Incredible Sex!

Subscribe and Join Me for More:

Work with Me: Find out more about my sex and intimacy coaching services here.

My Newsletter: Don’t miss out on VIP discounts on products from the best intimate wellness brands in the industry or my expert-backed sex and intimacy guides and tips! Subscribe here

My Spicey Site: Intimacy Demos & How-Tos Plus Guided Self-Pleasure Meditations and more. Subscribe here

My YouTube Channel. Catch my podcast here: youtube.com/@talksexwithannette

My website for coaching info, guides, and more: Talksexwithannette.com

Exclusive Deals on the Hottest Sex Products—Only for VIPs

Womanizer

Enjoy 15% Off Womanizer.com Products with Code EXPLORES15 at checkout. Womanizer is the OG in pleasure air tech, and I LOVE their products. I have lots of reviews to share with you and a whole lot of discounts!

Lovehoney

Enjoy 15% Off Lovehoney.com Products with Code EXPLORES15 at checkout
Shop adult sex toys, vibrators, lingerie, and male sex toys at Lovehoney US. Free shipping on orders over $49, with expert chat & email support and 30-day returns.

Eye of Love Pheromone Perfumes & Colognes

Enjoy 15% off Eyeoflove.com Products with Code LRT15
I’m in LOVE with these Pheromone Perfumes. Check out Confidence, Matchmaker Body Sprays, Body Massage Candles, and more

WeVibe

Enjoy 15% Off We-Vibe.com Products with Code EXPLORES15 at checkout
Adult Toys and Vibrators
Shop We-Vibe’s wide selection of adult sex toys and vibrators for her, for him, and for couples.

Velvet Prime Thrusters

Enjoy 20% off thethruster.com

Products with Code EXPLORES20
Velvet Thruster is the original handheld thrusting sex machine with patented drive system. Configure your custom dildo with Prime, thrusting dildo with changeable tops and easy-use accessories.

Lacier Vibrating Steel Sex Toys

Enjoy 30% off Lacier.com Products with Code EXPLORES20
L’Acier has released a full line of stainless steel dildos that vibrate! Each is designed like a fine musical instrument for pleasure.

Boutique Voila Sex Toys for Fun People

Enjoy 30% off BotiqueVoila.com Products with Code EXPLORES20.

Sex Toys for Fun People! Voila is a boutique Brooklyn business designing unique sex wellness products for solo self-pleasure, mutual masturbation, and couples sex enhancement. Check out our newest additions: Dinosaur clit suction and Bluetooth Thrusting Dildos

Tracy’s Dog Clit Suction Sex Toys

Enjoy 15% Off Tracysdog.com with code ANNETTE15
Tracy’s Dog is women’s most adored G-spot vibrator sex toy.

Good Vibes Sex Toys

Enjoy 10% Off Goodvibes.com with code SHEEXPLORESGV
GoodVibes carries everything you need. It brings you the ultimate in sexual education and inclusive pleasure products.

Babeland Sex Toys

Enjoy 10% Off Babeland.com with code SHEEXPLORESBL
Explore Babeland.com. Bringing you the best sex toys for a passionate world since 1993.