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Alright, let’s talk about something messy, filthy… and wildly misunderstood. Spit kinks.

Some men love it because it feels dominant, dirty, and primal—like marking territory, showing control, or just making things wetter. Some women love it for the same reasons—a little filth, a little power play, the feeling of complete surrender.

But let’s be real. Not everyone has a spit kink, and for a lot of women, a man spitting the wrong way, at the wrong time, or without permission? Immediate mood killer.

Spitting during sex is not just some random move you throw in. It’s a kink—a deliberate act of power, submission, and filth that needs to be done right to be sexy. So, if you’re gonna do it, let’s make sure you’re doing it right. I’m talking about when, where, and how to do it so it turns her on—instead of making her dry up and walk away.

Hard Rules Before You Even Think About Spitting

Full, explicit consent. Always. No assumptions, no surprises. If she doesn’t have a spit kink, it’s a no-go.
Fresh breath, clean mouth. Bad breath and sticky spit? Instant turnoff. Brush your teeth, drink water.
No phlegm, ever. This is sex, not a sick day. Spitting should be hot, not disgusting.
Do it with dominance and intention. No weak, lazy spit. Make it erotic.
Know your aim. Face, mouth, body, pussy—each has its own approach. Don’t just guess.
Read the moment. Just because she liked it once doesn’t mean she wants it every time.
Spit is NEVER a substitute for lube. Ever. If you need actual lubrication, use the real thing. Spit dries fast, gets sticky, and will not keep things wet the way her body (or a bottle of lube) will.

Now that you’ve got the basics down, let’s get into how to actually do it right."

#1: Spitting During Sex Is a Privilege, Not a Right

Let me be crystal clear: a spit kink isn’t something you just assume. It’s something you earn. Not every woman is into it, and if you spit on the wrong woman at the wrong time? You might end up with a slap instead of a moan.

So before you let that saliva drip, read the room. Better yet—ask. A simple 'You like it dirty, baby?' or 'You want me to spit on you?' goes a long way. If she’s into it, she’ll let you know. If she’s not? You just saved yourself from looking like an absolute fool."*

#2: Aim Matters—And So Does Execution

If she’s into it, great. But don’t get sloppy. A spit kink can be sexy as fuck—or it can be downright disgusting. And trust me, no woman wants to feel like she’s just been sneezed on.

Here’s how you do it right:

  • Spitting on her mouth? Make it slow. Controlled. Let her see the string of saliva stretch between your lips. Make it an invitation, not an ambush.

  • Spitting on her pussy? Do it like you mean it. Make it part of the moment—hold eye contact, let her feel the heat of your breath before you do it. Anything less? Feels lazy. Feels careless. Feels… gross.

  • Spitting anywhere else? Make sure it fits the moment. Dripping it onto her chest? Make her beg for it. Letting it fall onto her clit before you rub it in? Perfect. Just don’t rush it.

  • And for fuck’s sake—no hocking up phlegm. This isn’t a street corner. Keep it clean, keep it erotic.

  • And remember—spit is NOT lube. It dries fast, gets sticky, and does not replace a quality, body-safe lubricant. If things need extra wetness, reach for the good stuff.

#3: A Spit Kink Is About Power—So Use It Wisely

Here’s the real secret: a spit kink is about power. It’s about dominance, submission, filth, control. And when done right? It can send a woman into overdrive.

But the second it feels forced, rushed, or careless? It’s over. That’s the difference between a woman arching her back for more… and one rolling her eyes, getting up, and never calling you again.

So, if you wanna spit? Make it intentional. Make it part of the moment. Let it feel earned—not like some random trick you saw in porn. When done right, a spit kink isn’t just dirty—it’s devastatingly sexy.

So, there you have it—three rules for a spit kink done right. If you’re into it, own it. Do it well. Make it filthy in a way that turns us on—not off. And if you weren’t sure about it before? Well… maybe now you’ve got some ideas.

If you have questions or comments, send them to me at annette@talksexwithannette.com

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